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W
e probably all know
people either at work or
in our personal lives
who are really good listeners and masters at
managing their emotions. No matter what
kind of situation we are in, they always seem
to know just what to say – and how to say it
– so that we are not offended or upset under
strenuous situations. They can look at a
problem and calmly find a solution.They are
excellent decision makers who know when
to trust their intuition; caring and
considerate; and even if they fail to find a
solution to one’s problem, they usually leave
one feeling more hopeful and optimistic.
Regardless of their strengths, however, they
are usually willing to look at themselves
honestly. Not only do they take criticism
well, but they also know how to use it to
improve their performance. People like this
have a high degree of
Emotional
Intelligence Quotient
, or
EQ
. Knowing
themselves well they are able to sense the
emotional needs of others. People with high
EQ are usually successful in most things
they do, and are always wanted as part of a
group. They always receive a positive
response from others as they send out good
vibes.Their emails get answered and they get
help when they need it. Because they make
others feel good, they go through life much
more effortlessly than people who are easily
angered or upset.
The smartest people are not the most
successful or the most fulfilled people in life.
Many academically brilliant people are inept
and unsuccessful at work or in their personal
relationships.
Intellectual Intelligence
Quotient
or
IQ
is not enough on its own
to make one successful in life. One’s IQ can
help one to get into college, but it is one’s
EQ that will help one to manage the strain
and emotions one faces.
In his 1996 book ‘Emotional Intelligence’,
author Daniel Goleman suggested that EQ
might actually be more important than IQ.
Why? Some psychologists believe that
standard measures of intelligence (i.e. IQ
scores) are too narrow and do not
encompass the full range of human
intelligence. Instead, they suggest, the ability
to understand and express emotions can play
an equal if not even more important role in
how people fare in life. So, IQ alone is not
enough; EQ also matters. In fact,
psychologists generally agree that among the
ingredients for success, IQ counts for
roughly 10% (at best 25%); the rest depends
on everything else – including EQ.
What are the Differences
between IQ and EQ?
IQ is a number derived from a standardized
intelligence test. Earlier, scores were
calculated by dividing the individual's
mental age by his or her chronological age
and then multiplying that number by 100.
So, a child with a mental age of 15 and a
chronological age of 10 would have an IQ
of 150.Today, IQ is calculated by comparing
the test taker's score to the scores of other
people in the same age group.
EQ is a measure of a person's level of
emotional intelligence – the ability to
perceive or recognize one’s emotions,
control them, evaluate and understand what
they are telling one, express them, and
realize how they affect the people around
one. People who function at a high rate of
emotional intelligence have the ability to
adjust their behaviour and are more
effective at recognizing and managing their
own emotions as well as the emotions
of others.
Since the 1990s, emotional intelligence has made the journey
from a semi-obscure concept found in academic journals to a
popularly recognized term. Researchers such as John Mayer and
Peter Salovey as well as writers like Daniel Goleman have
helped shine a light on emotional intelligence, making it a hot
topic in areas ranging from business management to education.
Today, one can buy toys that claim to help boost a child's
emotional intelligence or enroll one’s children in social and
emotional learning (SEL) programmes designed to teach
emotional intelligence skills.
Emotional Intelligence –Why is it Important?
Many people hang their success in life on their IQ level. Yet,
there are really smart people who are limited in their lives
because they just do not interact well with others. They have
high IQs, but horribly low EQs. The good news is that while
an individual’s IQ may be a bit harder to change, anyone can
work on developing a better EQ in order to enjoy more success
in every area of life: social, emotional, physical, and financial.
Life involves interacting with other people, and high EQ people
just make each interaction more rewarding for everyone.
SoWhich One Is More Important?
IQ is still recognized as an important element of success,
particularly when it comes to academic achievement. People with
high IQs typically do well in school, often earn more money, and
tend to be healthier in general. But today experts recognize that
it is not the only determiner of success. Instead, it is part of a
complex array of influences that includes emotional intelligence
among other things.
The concept of emotional intelligence has had a strong impact
on a number of areas, including the business world. Many
companies now mandate emotional intelligence training and
utilize EQ tests as part of the hiring process.
Research has found that individuals with strong leadership
potential also tend to be more emotionally intelligent, suggesting
that a high EQ is an important quality for business leaders and
managers to have. Emotional intelligence equals interpersonal
effectiveness; the more effective you are with others, the more
successful you will be.
If emotional intelligence is so important, can it be taught or
strengthened? According to one analysis that looked at the
results of social and emotional learning programmes, the answer
to that question is an unequivocal YES.While EQ is not always
easy to change quickly, with a bit of effort, most people can
improve it with coaching, self-introspection, and feedback from
others.The other good news is that
EQnaturally increases with
age
, even if you do not conscientiously work on furthering it.
The Six Pillars of Emotional Intelligence
If your desire is to raise your emotional intelligence, here are
the six pillars to incorporate into your life:
1. Self-Awareness -
Being able to identify how you feel as well
as who you are, helps you make important life choices.
Reconnect with your inner self through silence and
meditation, and watch your perspective of life transform.
2. Empathy -
Extremely powerful and essential to raising your
emotional intelligence, empathy increases your ability to
identify with others and get closer to them, gain their
support when you need it, and potentially defuse highly
charged conflicts in your professional and personal life.
3. Self-Regulation -
By learning to control your emotions,
especially your impulses and moods, and direct them
towards serving your purpose, you are able to prepare
yourself for emotional self-management.
4. Motivation -
People who are emotionally intelligent are
highly motivated, excellent decision-makers, know when
to trust their intuition and are willing to defer immediate
results to establish long-term success.They can look at a
problem and find a resolution in a calm and rational way.
They also take criticism well and know when to use it to
improve their performance.
5. Social Skills –
You can raise your emotional intelligence by
talking and connecting with others better. Being socially
responsible demonstrates that you care about others and not
just about your own personal gain. Individuals who focus on
the development of others rather than their own, practise
emotional intelligence as well as humility and learn to
manage the emotions of others too.
6. Happiness -
Unfortunately, very few people know how
to manage their happiness as it is frequently associated
with material goods or gifts they receive from others.
Raising your emotional intelligence involves knowing
when to be happy, sad, excited, anxious, or even vigilant.
Generally, people with a high EQ are happy people.
Remember, it costs nothing to spread happiness, and what
you receive in return is priceless.
To raise your emotional intelligence, it is essential that you
try to incorporate these six pillars into your life in order to
create and maintain more meaningful and intimate
relationships in your professional and personal life.
IQ & EQ - Enhance your EQ
~ N. K. Dutt
HO Kolkata
JANUARY 2015 49
48 JANUARY 2015
“
Each of us is a
being in himself
and a being in
society, each of
us needs to
understand
himself and
understand
others, take care
of others and be
taken care of
himself.
”
~ Haniel Clark Long